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2003-03-02 - 12:26 p.m.

I’m bored, tetchy and down right cranky today. I’m mean as a junkyard dog and I’m blaming it on the continuous gray, cold days of winter. I piddled and puttered around the house and accomplished nothing, then decided to come in here and share my ill-temper with you. Misery loves company, you know.

Over the last week I’ve had no writing brainstorms. Not an iota of an idea, so to entertain myself I went scrounging around at Friday Five and pulled the list of questions originally posted for January 3, 2003—more testament to my procrastination!

For lack of a better title, I’ll call this rambling Festooned since the idea prompt deals with jewelry. I don’t even know why my meager mind grasped this particular prompt: I don’t wear much jewelry, and I don’t foresee decorating myself in the near future. What few ornaments I do wear are understated trinkets. Diamonds are not this girl’s best friend. In fact, the few small diamonds in two rings probably wouldn’t amount to a carat. I’ve never been dazzled by diamonds, and I’ve never felt the need to adorn myself with them. Maybe because I have a habit of losing jewelry.

My mother used to try to decorate me, and at birthdays or Christmas she would present me with a new piece of jewelry. She’s now learned those sparkly doodads end up at the bottom of the lake or down the shower drain, so now she’s giving me ball caps! By the way, she gave me a really fantastic ball cap for Christmas this year. Much better than a diamond necklace, and I haven’t lost it yet.

I do have a very nice gold watch, but the battery’s been dead for almost two years. Instead of taking it to the jeweler and getting a new battery, I wear a $14.95 timepiece from Wal-Mart. When it goes belly up I toss it out and get another one at Wal-Mart.

The only necklace I currently own is heavier than previous collars and is minus diamonds. It was a gift from my mother, and she thought it might not slither down the shower drain or break and sink while rough housing at the lake. Although I shed my rings and watch immediately when I get home from work each day—my bra is the second item to be yanked off and tossed—I never remove my necklaces. I forget about them, and days, sometimes weeks, later I discover they are no longer around my neck.

I have no piercings. Ears or otherwise. I’ve never even considered it as it always looked painful to me. I.Do.Not.Like.Needles! I did, however, one time buy a magnetic diamond stud and attached it to my nose and went off to work. It took a few hours, but one co-worker finally asked if I’d also gotten a butt tattoo over the weekend.

No, I don’t have any tattoos—other than the occasional rub on Harley tattoo SueSue forces me to wear. Nor do I ever plan to have any tattoos, despite diva’s threat of someday tattooing “Big Dummy” on my forehead. That, too, involves needles, and it’s one body embellishment I think I can do without in this lifetime.

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